I need a new nonstick pan.

While making grilled cheese for my 3 year old running circles around my house screaming and while holstering my 17 month old on my hip, a normal, run-of-the-mill lunch project turned into something more. I went to flip over the buttery, cheesy, yumminess and the sandwiches were sticking to the pan. That's odd. It's a non-stick pan that I usually have no problems with. Granted, it's a cheap-o version from IKea years ago, but still, I don't usually have a problem with things sticking. Well, today I had to get the cooking spray out so as not to turn the grilled cheese sandwiches into melted cheese mush-piles. I manages to save them (mostly) when God pointed something out to me. I need a new nonstick pan. This one is old and no longer helps me where I need it to help me out. So I need a new nonstick pan in this new year.

"So what?" you ask. That's weird. What I mean by all this is....I'm going through a rough spot spiritually and I need a fresh start in this new year. I need to throw out my old nonstick pan, I need to throw away all those things and feelings sticking to me about this past year and start new. I need a fresh dose of God's love. It's not going to come in church. It's going to come when I seek His face wholly. I need to delve in, I need to persevere....even when I feel alone. My spiritual life has been in such upheaval since my dad started to get really really sick. Yes, God helped me through the most difficult stretches....but the damage came after the dust settled. My nonstick pan is old and has lost its' usefulness - sort of like my faith. I hate to say it, but that's what I'm going through right now. I need to find it again.

I know God's there, he's there for me. I just have to look harder. After all, it's never Him that walks away from me, it's ME that's walks away from Him. I know I'm letting doubts, fears, anger, and sorrow corrode my pan to the point where the goop is sticking to my pan, rather than letting go to let God's Word in. There are so many people so upbeat for this new year, ready to make a fresh start. I just want a faith-freshener. And I know I'll get there. Because I won't give up. I KNOW God is good - ALL THE TIME.